You mean apart from speeding? Because you know everyone does it. LOL.
I grew up as a Christian - still am. My own father baptized me, because our Pastor was ill that particular Wednesday night. But being Christian is more than just believing in a higher being. Being Christian is loving your neighbor as thyself. And I can name a few who proclaim to say they love me, but it's more like "I love you, that's why I'm telling you you're living in sin and are going to hell. This thing you are, 'Gay' is an abomination!". Kinda funny since Jesus never mentioned anything about homosexuality.
Courtesy of the Huffington Post, I am using these images as part of today's "My Christian Thoughts". So if you're getting a haircut today, or going to work - I'm sorry, but you're damned to hell!
It's probably not a good idea to get any Tattoos. If you have some, get them removed.
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Leviticus 19:28 states:
Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you: I am the LORD. |
Thinking about getting a haircut? It better be certain kind or else.
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Leviticus 19:27 states:
Ye shall not round the corners of your heads, neither shalt thou mar the corners of thy beard. |
If there's ever been a time where you've cursed your parents, I'm sorry but you should have been killed a long time ago.
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Exodus 21:17 states:
"And he that curseth his father, or his mother, shall surely be put to death." |
I sure hope your marriage lasts, because getting remarried after divorcing is not a good thing.
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Mark 10:11-12 states:
Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth
adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband
committeth adultery. |
Sorry men, but if you're private parts are injured or removed in some terrible accident. You're not allowed in the building of the Lord.
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Deuteronomy 23:1 states:
He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD. |
If your husband gets into a fight, I recommend you wives better stay out of it. If you still want your hands!
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Deuteronomy 25:11-12 states:
When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one
draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that
smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets
Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her. |
Ahhh, for those who love to eat ham sandwiches, pork skins, or bacon!!!
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Leviticus 11:7-8 reads:
And the swine, though he divide the hoof, and be clovenfooted, yet he cheweth not the cud; he is unclean to you.
Of their flesh shall ye not eat, and their carcase shall ye not touch; they are unclean to you. |
You women need to keep your mouths shut. No, really.
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1 Corinthians 14:34-35 states:
Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted
unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as
also saith the law.
And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church. |
Ohhh gossipers! None exist. LIE!!!!
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Leviticus 19:16 states:
Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people: neither
shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbour; I am the LORD. |
If you're going to work today - you better not. This is no time for typing, shoveling, or trying to support a family.
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Exodus 31:14-15 states:
"Ye shall keep the sabbath therefore; for it is holy unto you: every one
that defileth it shall surely be put to death: for whosoever doeth any
work therein, that soul shall be cut off from among his people.
Six days may work be done; but in the seventh is the sabbath of rest,
holy to the LORD: whosoever doeth any work in the sabbath day, he shall
surely be put to death. |
I'm not even going to go here, because the likelihood that you're a virgin before getting married is slim to none, and a lot of you women - men included - should have been put to death a long time ago.
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Deuteronomy 22:20-21 states:
But if this thing be true, and the tokens of virginity be not found for the damsel:
Then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her father's house,
and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die:
because she hath wrought folly in Israel, to play the whore in her
father's house: so shalt thou put evil away from among you |
And don't go talking to a Psychic, much less look for Harry Potter.
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Leviticus 19:31 reads:
Regard not them that have familiar spirits, neither seek after wizards, to be defiled by them: I am the LORD your God. |
Finally, for those who love their shrimp, lobster and many other types of seafood. You're Screwed!!!! See you in hell.
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Leviticus 10-11 states:
And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of
all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the
waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination. |
