The Dark Knight Rises: How It Should Have Ended

In June I posted how The Avengers should have ended, and it was absolutely hilarious.  Well, now it's the Dark Knight's turn. LOL.

From the same fabulous guys who brought you Jurassic park: How It Should Have Ended, Return Of The Jedi: How It Should Have Ended, Super Cafe - The Super Social Network, and Super Cafe - Bat Phone, comes this hilarious re-telling of the blockbuster summer movie, The Dark Knight Rises: How It Should Have Ended. 

I Quote That - MOM

Cyanide and Happiness: Internet Yes Indeed

"We Built This" - Think Again RNC

Most Republicans think they got rich, just because they did.  Or they became successful on their own.  I'm not talking about the struggling Republicans who are on welfare and food stamps just around the corner from you, but the hard-working Republicans who think firefighters, teachers, policemen (you know all those who receive funds from the government) should be removed from the system.  Oh wait, even the poor Republicans think that way, yet they don't seem to know that by voting President Obama out of office will be a sure way they will never get their government food stamps and welfare checks. What hypocrites, I swear.  Hell, these people are having a convention in a building that was built with 62% of your government funds.  Oh and I can almost guarantee it was built by "illegal immigrants" too.

I stumbled across a wonderful blog on Tumblr, "Tumbling the Conventions," and I had to share a wonderful statement from author, Jason Oberholtzer.

election:

The theme for the Republican National Convention is “We Built This!” which aims to underline the GOP’s counterpoint to an Obama vagary of pronoun usage last month, where he said the following:

If you’ve been successful, you didn’t get there on your own. You didn’t get there on your own. I’m always struck by people who think, well, it must be because I was just so smart. There are a lot of smart people out there. It must be because I worked harder than everybody else. Let me tell you something — there are a whole bunch of hardworking people out there. If you were successful, somebody along the line gave you some help. There was a great teacher somewhere in your life. Somebody helped to create this unbelievable American system that we have that allowed you to thrive. Somebody invested in roads and bridges. If you’ve got a business — you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen. The Internet didn’t get invented on its own. Government research created the Internet so that all the companies could make money off the Internet.

Ironically, this year’s “We Built This!” RNC is being held in The Tampa Bay Times Forum arena, which was built in 1996 with 62% government funds.
- Jason

Post Secret Fridays - Issue 102 - My Special Issue

It's been a year since I last posted a "My Special Issue" of Post Secret Fridays and 3 months since I posted Issue 101 on my blog. But after watching the video below, I simply had to do it this morning. 

The video was posted by the founder of PostSecret, Frank Warren, and it's absolutely stunning. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend watching it. It has definitely made my morning, grateful to have the wonderful life I have, and happy to know I made a difference in many people's lives.

PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.

Here's the video:

Patrick Schwarzenegger Joins Lady Gaga

Arnold Schwarzenegger's gorgeous and famous son, Patrick has taken on a new project.  A public service announcement to promote Lady Gaga's "Born This Way Foundation."  You can read more about it at The Advocate, and check out this behind-the-scenes video of Patrick for Entertainment Tonight.

 

Thank you Patrick!

Tom Daley For Heat Magazine

And this is how you do a magazine cover.  Feature Tom Daley looking like a sexy nerd.  

Did I say I miss the Olympics already?

Is Ninety The New Twenty?

Do not make fun of this girl.  She's 90!  Yes, you read that right.  Sylvester Stallone's Mother is Ninety Years Old!  And she turns 91 in November.  

In the words by Michelle Visage, "Does this broad look 90 freakin’ years old to you? OK, I hear your screams through the computer. I know about the shitload of plastics going on here, but Jackie Stallone hasn’t looked this good since her 20s. Ignore the lips. Her body, her hair, her everything is flooring me. Ninety. Years. Old. Bitches."

The Hard Task of Being a Loving Parent: Kids Go Ape Sh*t Crazy Over The Odd Life of Timothy Green

Okay, parents should be arrested for this.  Just kidding, don't get all riled up.  But c'mon, why put your kids through torture by taking them to a movie you knew was not going to have a happy ending? That's why there's Disney cartoons.  

So maybe you didn't know what was going to happen - so what!  The moment you started feeling something wasn't going right, you should have grabbed your kids by the arm, pulled them out of their theater seats, and taken them to eat at McDonald's. LOL.

Instead you opted for this... 


And then you further humiliated your kiddos by making a video to post on blogs like mine. Aye, Aye, Aye.

Isn't This The Truth? Redneck Medical Terms

I had to post this on my blog - it is so absolutely true.  I know a certain group of people in certain nearby towns whose mentality mirrors much of this.  OMG, this is absolutely hilarious!  Here's a few to make you giggle...

Catscan....              searching for kitty.

Pain....                    getting hurt at work.

Medical Staff....      A Doctor's cane.

Seizure....                Roman Emperor.

Poster courtesy of Facebook friend, Melissa Novak,

It's Not One Direction - It's Wrong Direction, LOL.

So tell me this...  Are political ads supposed to excite you into voting, or are they there to turn you off from the opposing candidate?

I don't know about you, but I think I prefer political ads like this one.  Courtesy of Buzzfeed & Facebook, the music video below is a parody to One Direction's "What Makes You Beautiful", featuring former Houston native, Colby Melvin, and starring alongside him, Quinn C. Jaxon, David Brackett, Brandon R. Brown and Jonathan Myers.  

Sure they're taking on Mitt Romney as they play around the pool, but it's the message that's important, right? LOL. Check it out, it's pretty funny, and hot too.

Eating Eggs vs. Smoking? Tomato-Tomato

So my partner, Ryan works out 5 days a week.  He's at the gym early in the morning and exercises frequently.  Only problem is, he eats 3 boiled eggs a day and 2 cans of tuna a day.  He does this for protein intake, and it's been doing great.  But according to a news article I read last week, eating an egg yolk a day "regularly increases plaque buildup about two-thirds as much as smoking does".

So for those who eat eggs every single day, you may want to re-think your diet. Then again, if you believe in the "Western Diet vs. Low-Carb Diet", "Sitting on The Job 10 Years or More Means You Have a 94% Chance of Developing a Tumor", or believe "Watching TV Will Kill You" - you're gonna die anyway.

Aside from that, I still think Eggs have too much saturated fat, at least in the egg yolk.  So this week, I boiled 15 eggs and removed the yolks, since most of the protein is in the whites anyway.  

Now I feel a little more comfortable knowing I have given my nutritional advice for the day. :-)  You can check out the article here, it's pretty damning... this new study has really compared eggs to smoking.

Next... Tuna. LOL.

The Game of Thrones Kitty

Sorry, I just had to.  Lol.

If you're a pet or cat owner, you may find this absolutely hilarious.  If you're not, you still might.  It's a video of a cat singing the opening sequence to the popular medieval series, Game of Thrones which airs on HBO.

Oh So Very True!

Must Watch: The Lego Story

If you're in your 70's, 60's, 50's 40's, 30's, 20's, 10's or even 5, you'll enjoy this video.

Celebrating 80 years, Lego has put together a Pixar-esque video that is pretty darn cool - I really enjoyed watching it.  

The video tells the story of how Lego came to be, and the origin of the famous painful-foot-stabbing bricks.  LOL.  You won't be disappointed.

Hell, If I'm correct, my mom still has my original Legos I played with as a kid.  I need to have a talk with her. :-)

To Quill or Not To Quill

This picture looks kinda funny, huh?  Well, I'm sure the dog doesn't think so. She came upon a Porcupine that didn't want to be disturbed and the doggie got a face full of quills.  500 of them!  Ouch!

She underwent extensive surgery to have them removed, but some are still lodged in her.  Bella Mae is currently in recovery.

Read story here: The NY Daily News

The 2012 Race for the Presidency

Map, courtesy of the Washington Post.  You can click on the map and it will take you to a wonderful interactive experience.  Double-click your state, and you can see how your county voted in the last election.  Check it out.

Zac Efron Does John John Denim

I'm not sure where I read it, or who said it; but I think they said it best when describing Zac Efron in his recent photo shoot for John John Denim.

"It's pretty disturbing that the guy in the photo is prettier than the female models he's posing with."

Sorry ladies, I thought it was pretty funny and somewhat true.

Must Watch: Cut The World by Antony & The Johnsons

Starring actress Carice Van Houten and actor Willem Dafoe, this music video will leave  you with your mouth wide open.  I really don't know what to say about this video, aside from the fact that it was brilliant? Splendiferous?  You decide.  Maybe by watching it a second time you'll understand it more.  

The video does come with a statement, "This video may not be suitable for all audiences. Viewer discretion is advised."

Cyanide and Happiness: Nightmares

Quoted - "We Need To Talk About Kevin" Star Comes Out

“I’m queer. I have a lot of really wonderful friends who are of very different sexes and genders. I am very much in love with no one in particular. I’ve been trying to figure out relationships, you know? I don’t know if it’s responsible for kids of my age to be so aggressively pursuing monogamous binds, because I don’t think we’re ready for them. The romanticism within our culture dictates that that’s what you’re supposed to be looking for. Then [when] we find what we think is love — even if it is love — we do not yet have the tools. I do feel that it’s possible to be at this age unintentionally hurtful, just by being irresponsible — which is fine. I’m super down with being irresponsible. I’m just trying to make sure my lack of responsibility no longer hurts people. That’s where I’m at in the boyfriend/girlfriend/zefriend type of question.” – Ezra Miller (Kevin in We Need to Talk About Kevin) comes out in the latest issue of Out magazine.

When Will We Forget?

So based on the U.S. Census Bureau we tend to forget things that have happened in our lifetime at an alarming rate.  Or is that because more and more people are coming down with Alzheimer's?

While you may say, "I remember," that's pretty unlikely.  You probably remember reading about it, or learning about it in your high school history book, but do you actually remember being there at that specific time and place?

So by 2019, most of you will probably forget the Challenger Explosion, by 2027 you've forgotten about Lorena Bobbit, and by 2042, the first i-Phone.  Check out this list, it's pretty darn hilarious, but more than likely very true for most of us.

Isn't This The Truth? The Grndr You Wish You Had

Don't Lie.  You know this is the way you wished Grndr appeared on your i-Phone.  

Grindr-inspired underwear editorial styled by Miguel Enamorado with the hottest underwear from Calvin Klein, Emporio Armani, Versace and more, for the September 2012 issue of Interview magazine.

And there's many more to feast your eyes on here...

Quoted - Homeless Man Talking About the Day He Was Viciously Attacked

“He attacked me. He just ripped me to ribbons. He chewed up my face. He plucked out my eyes. Basically that’s all there is to say about it. For a very short amount of time I thought he was a good guy. But he just went and turned berserk. He apparently didn’t have a good day at the Beach and he – he was coming back. And I guess he took it out, took it out on me or something.” –  Cannibal victim Ronald Poppo, in an interview with CBS Miami

I thought this was absolutely crazy when it happened, and I feel so bad for Mr. Poppo.  I truly hope you can find peace.  Our prayers are with you!

Traffic Sign: God Hates Gays!

You have to love the good citizens of America who know there are stupid people in this country, and most of the world for that matter.  This lovely video was posted on YouTube last week by a woman who was driving home one night.  Everything in my right mind was telling me this had to be in Texas, because we have millions of crazies in this 'once upon a time' very blue state.  But I was wrong, it's another state full of crazies - Utah.

When the Utah Department of Transportation, Provo Police Department, and Utah Highway Patrol were contacted last week, this is what they had to say...

“Employees of each bureau expressed shock upon hearing the news of the sign, in several cases saying it was the first they had heard of it. Eventually it was established that the sign was on the I-15 corridor. Utah Department of Transportation spokeswoman Mindy Nelson told Gay Salt Lake that signs are maintained by contractors who have the messages approved by UDOT. The sign was most likely changed by one of the contractor’s employees who thought he or she was playing a prank. ‘A very bad prank that is obviously unacceptable,’ she said. Inquires to UDOT regarding the contractor responsible for the sign, and the department’s response and investigation were not returned as of press time.”

Cyanide and Happiness: Removed

OMG! The humanity! LOL.