10 Yr. Old Boy from The Woodlands Takes a Joy Ride
Courtesy of blogger Michael K and MSNBC, I bring you this crazy adventure starring 10-year-oldZilan Fitchout of The Woodlands, TX, a town 2 seconds from where Ryan and I live. Imagine how much we laughed when watched the video (down below) and read this story...
When Zilan's mom,Christi Sanders, punished him last Wednesday morning, he did what any self-respecting bad little shit would do: he jumped in her SUV and drove away. Christie immediately got in her other car and chased after Speed Zilan through the streets of their neighborhood. Proving that he's a better driver than most, Zilan stayed in his lane and even used his signal before turning.
Christie called the police and they want after Zilan too, but their asses couldn't keep up. Even after another car hit Zilan from behind, he put the bitch to the metal and kept driving as though he could see Mexico ahead and Thelma was screaming "DRIVE! DRIVE! DRIVE!" into his little ears. The chase eventually ended when Zilan pulled into a doughnut shop parking lot. The cops arrested his little ass and took him down to juvie. Zilan was released and charged with unauthorized use of a motor vehicle.
When the local news asked Zilan what he learned from this, he answered, "Sitting in jail, we had to sleep on a metal bed."
That's it?! Zilan could've crashed into that store and murdered dozens of doughnuts and that's all he has to say?! He might as well have said, "I don't give a fudge." (Zilan will lose his sleeveless jersey wearing privileges for a whole week if he says the F word). It's official. The 2011 reincarnation of Latarian Milton has been born.
Well if I was named Zilan then I'd want to kill somebody with my SUV too. Just saying. This kid is not smart enough to sit there and watch his mom drive everyday and then suddenly know how to do it himself. He was obviously taught and this is what you get. Just imagine this: Go a little more North and you'll hit Conroe, where they teach their 10 year olds how to operate a gun, not just an SUV. God help us all.
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3 comments:
Well if I was named Zilan then I'd want to kill somebody with my SUV too. Just saying. This kid is not smart enough to sit there and watch his mom drive everyday and then suddenly know how to do it himself. He was obviously taught and this is what you get. Just imagine this: Go a little more North and you'll hit Conroe, where they teach their 10 year olds how to operate a gun, not just an SUV. God help us all.
This was right up the road from me Peter!!!
That is too funny. LOL.
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