What a Hot Fucking Mess! Real-Life Hannibal Lecter Shot Dead Over The Weekend

I'm sorry, I tried to refrain from using inappropriate language, but this is just absolutely horrendous! 

Yes, it sounds like a story meant only for the theater, but it's true.  A man's face was eaten by another human being in what is called one of the most bizarre stories in a very long time. 80 percent of the victim's face was completely gone, including his nose and eyeballs.  The victim is currently in a local hospital in Miami.  Honestly, I don't know if I would want to be alive after this.

According to the Courthouse News Service "A naked man eating another man's face "growled like a wild animal" before he was shot dead by Miami police, a police officer said, telling Courthouse News, "I think this is the craziest thing anyone's ever heard of." The dead man, possibly in the throes of a drug-induced psychosis, allegedly ignored the officers demand to stop eating the other man.

The story broke late last week and has been making the rounds over Facebook like wildfire. I failed to mention it until now, because I was enjoying my Memorial Day weekend.

Sad thing is, I think this will be made into a movie within a year or so.

Christmas By The Numbers: The Infographic

Wow, this is pretty impressive when you consider the amount of time that's actually spent observing the day for what it's meant to be celebrated for.

350 Million future Christmas trees are being grown on farms at this very moment, because Americans buy 25-30 million trees each Christmas season. Wow.  Mind boggling, isn't it?

by Column Five Media via

Mind-Boggling News: Penis Thrown Into Garbage Disposal

Yeah, you read that right.  You might've thought that Lorena Bobbitt was long gone, but that bitch has returned. Re-incarnated!  

Back when I was in college we all read about how this crazy woman cut off some dude's dick, and threw it out in a field somewhere.  In the end, the dick was found and they sewed it back together, but the anguish he must have felt - ugh, I can't even think about it.

This time around, a woman named Catherine Kieu Becker filled her husband up with drugs or some type of poison to make him sleepy, tied him up, and when he woke up, told him, "you deserve this you fucking bastard," and cut off his dick.  Okay, so she didn't say "you fucking bastard," but she did chop the damn thing off.  She went to the kitchen and dropped it in the garbage disposal, "chop, chop, chop."

The guy is listed in stable condition after emergency surgery.  OMG, I feel for the guy - there are some crazy bitches out there.  

Straight guys, if you're reading this - and you cheat - you better fucking run.  Gay guys, we know you don't do that sort of thing, we value our dicks too much.  If our boyfriends or husbands cheat, we just sleep with their best friends or their very hot brother. LOL, just kidding.

Mind-Boggling News: Man Faces 10 years in Prison and Up To a $10,000 Fine

So... I'm reading the Houston Chronicle this morning when I read the most mind-boggling news ever!  No, really.  

Long story short, a man got pulled over by a cop early Tuesday morning for having no headlights on (been there, done that), and he noticed the man's face was bloody.  He looked outside the vehicle, and noticed his front windshield was caved in.

I know what you're thinking... blah, blah, blah, we've heard that before.  Well, get this...

The cop also saw a body on the passenger seat, partially under the dashboard, along with a severed leg.  So you can just imagine the shock the cop must have felt, because I'm in shock just writing this.  Jesus.

According to the investigation, the man struck a 32-year old man whose ford explorer had broken down on the side of the road, and continued to drive 3 miles before he was pulled over.  The missing leg was later found at the site of the explorer.

Furthermore, the Police said the driver told the deputy he had hit something on the freeway and that he didn't know the victim was in the passenger seat beside him.

This is just horrible, our hearts and prayers go out to both families.

The driver now faces 10 years in prison, and up to a $10,000 fine.  Pretty steep, don't you think???

Mind-Boggling News: Let's Play Russian Roulette With A Dog

Here's a mind-boggler for you.  You know I can never stop bitching about stupid people, but this cuts the cake.  Well.. maybe not.  I've posted some other mind-boggling news that were pretty outrageous.

Apparently drinking did little to help Russell Little with his depression Tuesday night.  Not only did the Indiana man take it upon himself to play Russian Roulette (you know - the game where 2 idiots take turns firing a gun at each other's heads with only 1 bullet in it), with his dog.  Let's see, how do I put this?

In simplest turns - The doggie won.

Of course the facts are in dispute, but this is what I grabbed from the article:

Little's wife told police he was sitting in the backyard depressed and drinking moonshine when he took a handgun and began playing Russian roulette with the pet dog at about 9 p.m.

After a couple of empty clicks aimed at the dogs head, "She said he got tired of that, then put the gun to his own head and pulled the trigger," said Capt. Jim Andrews of the South Bend Police Department.

Now the story is changing as I write this post. According to close family and friends of Little say,

Mr. Little was NOT playing Russian roulette with his dogs, he loved his dogs...nor was he drinking 'moonshine'. He was a loving and devoted father husband, friend, AND proud dog owner. He will be sorely missed and remembered fondly. - Nicole

Regardless of the outcome, this isn't good either way you look at it.  I can't imagine myself drinking and having a gun in my hand at the same time.  That's a No-No in my book.

Mind-Boggling News: Carrie Gets A Makeover

Why does Hollywood continue to re-make movies?  Do they not have any other book adaptations for us to fantasize about? Are they out of superheros to save us from doom?  Seriously? Lindsay Lohan as Carrie?  Are you kidding me?  

Okay, I just bombarded this post with many questions, but I honestly have them.  The original movie was released in 1976 - the year my sister, Victoria was born, and to think my niece, Liliana will be born during the remake of this atrocity is mind-boggling to me.

According to Entertainment Weekly:

Thirty-five years after Stephen King’s first best-seller roared into theaters and scared a generation of prom-going teens, MGM and Screen Gems have hired playwright Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa to resurrect Carrie with a more faithful adaptation of King’s novel, according to Deadline. But King, who famously disapproved of Stanley Kubrick’s adaptation of The Shining, tells EW he still has a soft spot for Brian De Palma’s original film: “I’ve heard rumblings about a Carrie remake, as I have about The Stand and It. Who knows if it will happen? The real question is why, when the original was so good? I mean, not Casablanca, or anything, but a really good horror-suspense film, much better than the book. Piper Laurie really got her teeth into the bad-mom thing. Although Lindsay Lohan as Carrie White… hmmm. It would certainly be fun to cast. I guess I could get behind it if they turned the project over to one of the Davids: Lynch or Cronenberg.”

And TMZ also reports that the Lohan is very interested in playing the part.

Stephen King mentioned Lindsay Lohan by name as a possible star in a remake of the classic film “Carrie” — and sources close to Lindsay tell us … she’d jump at the chance to play the iconic role … Sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ … she said she was “stoked” when she heard King mention her name and thinks working with King “would be epic.” We’re told Lindsay is a big fan of King’s work and, if the opportunity presented itself, she’d love to land a role in the upcoming adaption of his famous book, “The Dark Tower.”

I don't know about you, but I think they should leave well-enough alone.  The original Carrie, starring Sissy Spacek is a classic!  Look at the mess they created with the remake of "The Amityville Horror."  Oh okay, it had Ryan Reynolds in it, BUT THAT'S BESIDES THE POINT!  Isn't it bad enough they're re-making The Neverending Story?!?!?! What Blasphemy!

Mind-Boggling News: Woman Goes On Rampage at Fast Food Restaurant

What is wrong with people, really?  Am I just being too judgemental?  

When idiots like this (see video) walk into a McDonald's restaurant, and go all American Psycho on the employees, they're not only making a fool of themselves, but showing the world how well our education system is working. Okay, maybe I shouldn't have said that, because smart people pull this crap too.  In either case, this is the second time in two weeks I've come across a disturbing video a involving a McDonald's restaurant.

 

I don't think I'll be working at a McDonald's anytime soon - it's life or death it seems like.  My love (my partner Ryan), if you're reading this, please stay at Bank of America - it's safer!

Mind-Boggling News: National Hiring Day Consists of Running Over People

Remember when McDonald's announced two weeks ago that they were going to hold a National Hiring Day in order to fill 50,000 jobs at all it's restaurants?

Well... Ronald  is frowning, and it looks like Mr.McDonald   got more than he bargained for.  Now we wait and see what lawsuits will be popping-up out of this crazy-ass incident.  Even though McDonald's is indirectly involved, these bitches will somehow find a way to sue - mark. my. words.

On Tuesday, in "what was supposed to be an uplifting event to help boost the economy," two bitches went for each other's throats, probably because there wasn't enough "Bic Mac's secret sauce" on one of their burgers.  This shit is crazy - like for real.  

One of the bitches ran over the store's owner, manager and several other people before driving off.

Mind-Boggling News: I Killed My Cat For GAGA!

It's not only the Beiber-crazies that are looney when it comes to worshiping their idols, apparently Gaga has some too.  Courtesy of Max Read from Gawker:

Full size

A 20-year-old Oklahoma woman killed and mutilated her family's cat, apparently so she could use its blood for an outfit to wear to a Lady Gaga concert. Talk about a "little monster"! But seriously, she killed a cat.

According to police, Angelina Barnes drowned the cat, sliced open its belly, mutilated its eyes and removed its liver, which cops later found "in a makeup case on the counter." An unidentified relative arrived home to find Barnes—who had "cover[ed] light switches with duct tape so she wouldn't be able to turn on the light"—dressed in a "long coat" with "streaks of what turned out to be cat blood on her face." This was, it seems, the outfit she planned on wearing to the Lady Gaga concert.

As you might expect, Barnes did not go to the Lady Gaga concert. She went instead to the hospital, "where she threatened a male nurse with a piece of glass"; she's now "receiving treatment" at a local hospital. Tonight, Lady Gaga plays Miami.

First, I really hate the fact that people use the phrase 'a male nurse' instead of simply just saying 'a nurse.'  Like one commenter said, "Seriously. I wonder if she saw a 'female doctor' during her stay." 

It's a profession people, get it together - a nurse is a nurse, a doctor is a doctor - it doesn't matter if your male or female.

As for the story, I'm so happy Ryan didn't mutilate our chihuahuas as obsessed as he is about The Lady; Sometimes I wonder what he'll do next.
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Mind-Boggling News: I Super-glued a Tiny Hat to My Head - PLEASE HELP!

Courtesy of news from the United Kingdom...

Shawn super-glued a miniature sequined fedora to the side of his head, and what was fashionable by night, became a living nightmare by day.

In related news, Dr. Harry Coover, the creator of Super Glue, has passed away at the age of 94.

 

Come to find out, the nurse who treated Shawn wasn't too keen on the idea of people making fun of him ever since this video surfaced, and she had this to say...

As the Nurse who looked after Sean, I'd like to stick up for him. He DID try soaking it off, and he DID try nail polish remover aswell. He came to A&E as a last resort so all of you making negative comments really need to chill out and see it for what it was. xx - Mrs. Dabass

Of course, with a name like Dabass, I'd be concerned too.

Mind-Boggling News: True Blood Amateurs Only Get Probation

Amanda Williamson, 21, and Aaron Homer, 24

Seriously?  Three years probation? Is that all you can do for aggravated assault? 

Two idiots who actually believe they're vampires, sucked the living blood out of this poor homeless kid back in October, in return for providing a roof over his head. When the poor guy (Robert Maley) didn't allow the couple (Aaron Homer and Amanda Williamson) to suck on his blood any longer, they stabbed his ass. Well not his ass, but you know what I mean.

 "I said no, and he flipped," Maley told police. "He said, 'I'm doing it,' and then boom . . . he stabbed me."  "They think they are vampires," said Maley of Homer and Williamson.

The story is insane. From the hidden knife in the couple's bed, to the 25 yr-old Maley running out the door bleeding profusely, and odd stories of paganism lead me to believe these fools belong in a sanitarium, not on our streets feeding on our friends and family.  And possibly our Pets!!!

Probation?  What is wrong with this picture?

Mind-Boggling News: Dog Has A Midnight Snack

Imagine waking up in the morning as you normally do, and notice you are missing three toes.  That is exactly what happened to a 61 year old man in Oregon.  

OMG, I would totally freak out if my little Chihuahuas (all 4 of them) were having a feast on my feet while I slept.  And when I'm tired, I'm tired, just ask Ryan (my partner), I'm literally in a state of cryostasis.

According to the Associated Press, the dog, which was a Shinu Ibu, ate the dogs toes "most likely out of instinct to help remove diseased flesh."  I'm sorry, but having diabetes is not diseased flesh, he just had numbness of the feet possibly.  In either case, the dog has been given up for adoption and "appears to be anxious."  Yeah, I would be too.

And You Thought This Guy Was Human

The Japanese are at it again.  Well, this time with the help of their Danish counterparts they have created their first ever Robot with a Goatee. The Geminoid DK, yes there's even a facebook page.  When I first saw the image online I thought he was human, but no, I was wrong.

American scientists were first when it came to the bearded robot, but like almost everything else, we are behind with the times. What is this country to do?  Lord, by the time our children have grown up, America will be the Land of the Lost instead of the Land of the Free.  We've fallen behind on the space race, with China on the verge of major space exploration.  In 20 years we'll no longer be the world's largest economy, our healthcare system is out of whack, and as far as education is concerned, we are in a downward spiral.  Instead of taking political terrorism or GLBT classes in college (sorry Guillermo), maybe we should be focusing on Math or Science.

Enough of my ranting, watch the creepy robot below.