The Best Burger in America - As if......

..... we didn't know who had the best burger in town.  Seriously though; If you're from Texas, or from Corpus Christi for that matter - you're all too familiar with the famous burger that had many of us munching on them when the bars closed on any given night.  I won't even begin to tell you how well Whataburger employees knew me. LOL.  

Corpus Christi, Texas is the birthplace of this wonderful creation and so proud to say, "We're CHAMPIONS!!"

Thank you Fast Company for sharing this info.

The McGrand Tomato

image courtesy of LikaLaruku

Wow, leave it to the Japanese to come up with these insane McDonald's ads.  "Insane" meaning, pretty cool.  And why is it that foreign companies come up with the best ads, or newest products?  I never heard of this sandwich, but it does sound good. :-).  Love the couture.

The Skittles Burger

Who knew? LOL.

Foods That Will Make You Fat - Issue No. 25

Go get your gun.  Seriously.  After you take a look at today's issue of "Foods That Will Make You Fat", you will wish you had one, or use the one you got.

I'm going to say this only once.  That bitch, Paula Dean needs to go to prison.  She is going to kill everyone on this planet with her recipe ideas.  She's the reason we have all these idiots coming up with these insane concoctions.  Lady's Brunch Burger, really?

Lady's Brunch Burger

She's become a star on the Food Network and has been responsible for millions of lives.  This bitch needs to go to prison.  Her name is Paula Dean.  Okay, so I lied, I said it twice.  This woman who introduced us to heart attacks and strokes at an early age is not your average mother or grandmother.  Look at that yummy sandwich up there, isn't that a sandwich fit for a Lady?  Hell NO!  A lady wouldn't touch that if she had an ounce of class left in her.  A hamburger patty topped with a fried egg & bacon, in-between 2 Krispy Kreme doughnuts. Are you kidding me? Does it make your mouth water? Ugh.. I'm done with her.

Surprise Cake

Doesn't this cake look delicious!  It looks like a yummy pineapple upside down cake, doesn't it?  Zoom in a little closer....  yeah, you see what I see!!!  SHRIMP and PIGGIES!   It's 2 layers of yellow cake with a sweet mayo frosting covered in ham and topped with shrimp, pineapple, mandarin oranges and a cherry.  The only good thing about this hot mess of cake..... it's only made in Sweden.  Supposedly it's very popular on kid's birthdays over there.  Now I don't know which country's worse.  And it's not called a surprise cake, it's called a Smorgastarta aka shrimp and ham cake.

The Atlanta Exit Wound

This is when you get your gun.  Do it now, because when I tell you what's in this hot mess of a pot, you will die regardless.  The bottle of hot sauce I can deal with, but when you say 4 packages of cream cheese, a bottle of blue cheese dressing (yes, a whole bottle), and 6 chopped chicken breasts, I.....

Foods That Will Make You Fat - Issue No. 23

Are people really this stupid?  Oh wait!

Sorry, wrong segment.  This is about Foods That Will Make You Fat, Right?

You're probably wondering what the hell is wrong with me, but after witnessing a Porkgasm for the first time, I absolutely lost it.  I couldn't remember whether I was coming or going.  Seriously, who comes up with these terrible concoctions?  Is it a sin to eat these type of foods?  Or is it a sin to overindulge yourself with food? I forget.

The Porkgasm

Shoot me now!  No. Really.  I don't even know what to say about this hot mess of a recipe.  The piggy above consists of bacon strips, bacon sausage, ham sausage, ham slices, smoked pork sausage and roasted pork belly surrounded by ground sausage, wrapped in bacon and roasted. Oh, and you can't forget the garnish, chili peppers for the ears and tail - the only fat free thing on this god-forsaken plate.  And what the hell is bacon sausage?

Egg n' Ham Sammich

Awww, why don't we give this horrible sandwich a cute little name like "sammich."  Really?  What idiot came up with this crazy mess?  And why would they use only 11 eggs and not a full dozen?  Whatever. This regular ham and cheese sandwich comes complete with 11 sunny-side up egg yolks, bread, ham and cheese.  Doesn't it look appetizing?

Bacon and Cheese Stuffed Pizza Burger

The Bacon and Cheese Stuffed Pizza Burger consists of the following: two sausage and pepperoni pizzas (serving as the bun), a 5-pound hamburger patty, two pounds of bacon, and two pounds cheese (plus an onion and two bulbs of garlic).  You think I'm kidding don't you?  You think I come up with all this crap on my own and just post it for laughs, right?  DAMMIT, YOU'RE WRONG!  Here's the other 9 pictures that preceded the one up above.

Foods That Will Make You Fat - Issue No. 20

I didn't know whether to laugh hysterically or scream "STOP!" while searching for today's Foods That Will Make You Fat.  I came across these ridiculous concoctions that made me laugh, and quite frankly I thought I had lost it.  LOL.

What makes people come up with these ideas is beyond me. I can't imagine sitting at my table writing a new recipe, and asking myself, "hmmm, I wonder what waffles, cheese and hamburger meat would taste like?"

The Thunderdome

Oh Lord Jesus, please help me.  Three stacks of bacon, sausage, elk meat, onions and cheese between tortillas all topped with sour cream, two fried eggs and scallions.  Elk meat? Really?  I feel sorry for the poor animal that died just to be made into this pile of hot mess!

Hot Beef Sundae

I honestly don't want to know, but it looks like roast beef, mashed potatoes, cheese, and a cherry tomato on top.  And who knows what else is underneath that pile of crap.  OMG! That is so disgusting!  I guess this gives a whole new meaning to the popular side, "Loaded Mashed Potatoes".

Cheeseburger Waffles

You thought I was kidding when I wrote my piece up at the top, didn't you?  But seriously?  Why would you take my Eggo and do this to it?  I want syrup, not cheddar cheese and ground beef smothered all on top of it.  The least you could have done was add bacon!

YES!  THESE FOODS WILL MAKE YOU FAT!

Foods That Will Make You Fat - Issue No. 18

Ooooh, check out all the yummy goodness below.  Isn't your mouth salivating over these fine foods that will make you fat?  My tummy is screaming for them right now.  If it's not, you and your tummy have issues. 

I mean, who wouldn't want to eat something titled "Deep Fried Cheese-Stuffed Portabello Mushroom Cheeseburger"?

Ultimate Snack Stadium

Go ahead and call a doctor so that he can be on hand when I collapse on the floor from eating all those damn twinkies.  The stadium comes complete with Slim Jim goalposts, reservoirs of queso and salsa for the end zones, fans made from assorted snack foods and the stadium itself constructed from 58 Twinkies.

Deep Fried Cheese-Stuffed Portabello Mushroom Cheeseburger

Say that 5 times, quickly! Do it now! Geezus...  Who doesn't like anything stuffed?  I know you gay boys do :-) he he.  Seriously, it's true, you're not stuffed between two gorgeous guys like you dreamed it could be, instead you have a big ass mushroom stuffed with cheese, stuffed between two beef patties smothered in cheese, stuffed between a huge hamburger bun dripping with cheese.  It's a heart-clogging cheese galore!

Tater Tots with Cheese Extravaganza

Ahhhh, the lovely tater tots with cheese.  But these aren't you're regular "Sonic" tater tots with cheese, these are tots smothered in cheddar and mozarella cheeses, covered in Jalapeno's with bits of tomatoes and some black olives.  Throw on some sour cream and salsa, and you have you're next regurgitated meal!  Okay, I've had enough.

YES!  THESE FOODS WILL MAKE YOU FAT!